May 17, 2013

• Happenings in my Head

  I keep thinking to myself that I will most certainly write something today. But then I try and I realise that there is so much going on in my head that it is hard to pick out individual themes. So instead of trying to do that I am just going to write about the happenings in my head….

  … imagine you are a scribble on a piece of paper. One that goes round and round and round in circles that cross over each other in a big mess. Now make that 3D. That is my brain. It is a Scribble Ball. Every now and then I experience a very strong desire to just stop and scream, for no particular reason. Of course I don’t actually do that because it is considered inappropriate (with the exception to at the end of the second verse of Row Row Row Your Boat…. “if you see a crocodile, don’t forget to scream, AAAAHHH!” I’m allowed to do it then but there is only so many times that it is acceptable to do so.)

  I am in the process of attempting to smooth out my scribble brain. Hopefully it will then become more of a Wavy Brain.

  I am beginning to feel more in control (though I don’t expect anyone reading this knew that I was out of control). I am finding enjoyment in my job again, though I still struggle with worrying too much about the other members of staff and how they feel about each other. I am organising my time a little better which will hopefully make it easier to fit in housework, writing essays, seeing friends, spending time with my husband as well as spending time on my own alongside working 45 hours a week. I am finding ways to cope better with my anxiety’s and worries and sometimes they are working.

  I am completely in love with my almost 10-month old niece. I only see her about once a month but she is quite honestly the most incredible baby I have ever met and I was not quite prepared for how much I would love her. It is also amazing to see my brother and sister in law as parents, they have taken to it so well. This is possibly helped by the fact that they managed to have the perfect baby… she has slept through the night since she was about 3 months old and even before that she only didn’t because she had to be woken up to be fed. She loves food and is naturally weaning herself off milk. She has an incredible routine which she already knows well and though she does not like naps, when she is put down for the night she makes no fuss at all. She is amazing and I love her.

  I am seriously excited for my other brother’s wedding in October. I cannot wait to buy a properly expensive dress suitable for such an occasion. I am also making a ginger cake as one of their wedding cakes so I need to start practicing! We will be eating several ginger cakes before October I feel.

  I must finish now so that I can continue smoothing out my brain… and also hang up the washing.

   

   

  • 1:10 pm
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